Catching up

Wow, a lot has happened since I posted something on here.  I guess the most pertinent event for the general content of my blog is that I successfully completed the Fargo half marathon in May.  I hoped to finish in around 2 hours.  My official time was 2:11:51.  I went out a little fast (surprise) and basically survived the last 4 or 5 miles.  I thought I knew what sore legs felt like! 

While I was pleased to finish, it wasn't as satisfying as I thought it would be.  When I started running barefoot back in 2010, what excited me most was my ability to go out and run without feeling tired or having any pain or discomfort other than muscle soreness.  In running the half marathon, I think I've found that my limit for that is about 8 miles.  I underestimated how tough those last miles would be.  It was frustrating to have to slow my pace that much and to finish quite a bit over my goal time.  I also felt a lot worse afterwards than I thought I would.  I thought my conditioning was where it needed to be to finish strong and recover quickly, but I was pretty miserable for a day or two afterwards.  All of that meant that I was pretty sure that I wasn't going to try to run another half marathon again.  I did it, and I'm proud that I ran 13.1 miles barefoot, but I wasn't sure it was something I ever wanted to do again.

So, after about a week off from running, I started getting ready for my next major running event: the Bonanza Valley Days 2 mile run.  It was fun to get back to running shorter distances, and I worked really hard to get faster.  I have a friendly competition going with a member of the parish.  We're the same age.  He only runs a couple times a year, while I obviously enjoy running more frequently.  He always wins, but it's fun to go out and compete and to push him to run as fast as he can.  He won again this year, but by only about 10 seconds.  I ran the two miles in just over 14 minutes, which put me in third place behind him and a guy who just graduated high school and went to state in cross country (he ran it in about 12 minutes).  Needless to say, I was pleased with how I ran.

Most of the rest of my July was spent on a youth mission trip to Florida, so not a lot of running happened in there.  I got back to running at the end of the month and first part of August, and I ended up running the 5k in a neighboring town this last weekend.  I didn't run it as strongly as I thought I could and finished just under 24 minutes, not bad, but not quite what I hoped to do. 

So, now I've got my eyes set on the Fargo Mini Marathon in October.  I'll be running the 10k again, and I'm really looking forward to it.  I ran it last year in 54:23, and I'm hoping to improve on that.  It'd be great if I could run it in under 50 minutes, but we'll see.  It's time to start working my mileage up again, so hopefully I can do that without any setbacks.  Finishing without pain or injury is always my first priority, so I'll run as fast as I can without damaging my body.  Again, that's what was so frustrating about the half marathon finish.  I like to run in a way that's life-giving to me.  I felt like at the end of the half marathon, I had beat myself up and tortured my body instead of doing something good for it.  It just wasn't...fun.

Having said that, when we registered for the 10k, it asked if we planned on running the marathon or half marathon in the spring.  We both said "yes" again to the half marathon, so I think I'll try it one more time.  I'm still refining my training techniques, so hopefully I can finish again, this time without beating my body up too badly.  It has finally settled my mind about one thing, however: I'm NEVER running a marathon.  Running 13.1 miles barefoot is enough...I'll leave anything more than that to the truly crazy...

Footprints in the Snow

I've mentioned several times how cool it is to run in the snow in my Vibrams.  The sight of my own (nearly) bare footprints in the snow still makes me smile and feel more deeply alive.  During my last run, I came across two deer (a doe and her fawn).  They were about 1/4 mile ahead of me.  I watched them scamper along the road for a while in front of me before bounding across a snowy field that's part of a wildlife refuge.  Seeing my footprints alongside their hoof marks was really neat.  It made me think a little bit about my relationship to nature and our place as human beings in the world.  My footprints next to theirs reminded me that in some ways I'm their kin, a fellow creature on this earth, but seeing them effortlessly leave the road and leap through the fields made me also remember how different I am from them.  Leaving my shoes behind had drawn me a little closer to them, but there's still a line between me and them that feels almost holy.  I can feel close to nature, but not quite fully a part of it.  As a person of faith, this points to my belief that human beings have a special place on this earth: a little higher than the other creatures, but a little lower than the angels.  We occupy the space between the natural and the supernatural.  We have some knowledge of both, but cannot fully grasp either of them.  I think that's why there was a part of me that was firmly rooted on the road and a part of me that longed to leap out into the field with the deer.  That line between the sacred and the profane, between heaven and earth, became a bit blurry for a moment.  Somehow my footprints in the snow felt both natural and alien.  I sensed I am a part of this world and yet a stranger to it.  I think there's grace in that, and an opportunity to see ourselves as we really are...all in one footprint:

Warmer Wind

A band called Low Stars put out an album several years ago with a track titled "Warmer Wind."  The chorus goes, "There's a warmer wind and I can feel it, calling me again.  I'm moving on."  While the song is about moving on from one relationship to another, I thought of it today as I ran outside for the first time in several months.  A temperature of 28 degrees and a windchill of 17 might not sound warm to you, but it felt balmy compared to the bitter cold we've had for most of this winter.  Most importantly to me, it meant that it was warm enough to get out and get a few miles in.  My running shoes were calling me again, so I was moving on outside for a quick 2.5 mile run.

It felt good to run again.  I took it easy for the most part.  I could tell my conditioning is a little lacking right now, but that's what I expected.  I was more winded than usual, even with a slower pace.  Most importantly, though, I came back with no pain.  I can't describe how amazing that is, especially when my experience up til this last year with running was one filled with knee pain, back pain, chest pain, etc.  It's simply wonderful to go run and feel like it's something my body was built to do, rather than something I'm punishing my body with.  Sure, I tax my muscles and endurance, but it feels like I'm doing it in a natural way that my body can tolerate.  I'm not fighting my body, I'm truly exercising it. 

I've also had a few more good experiences with cross country skiing lately.  I was invited to go along with a group of people to their farm to ski some trails they have back around their hunting cabin.  It is a really beautiful place and it made me feel good to know that they thought I had improved enough to go with them.  I only fell three times (once on purpose), and kept up with them pretty well.  I had a great time and they all said I did really well for being so new to it.  I hope I can get out a few more times before the snow is gone. 

I don't have much more to add right now, oddly enough.  No profound revelations or deep thoughts.  I'm just happy to do something I love again.  I hope these warmer winds are here to stay for a while!

Learning to ski

I haven't run in several weeks, and I can't stand it!  If you don't love to run, you won't understand, but there are some days when I want nothing more than to be outside running.  That's why it's tough to go to the window and see nothing but snow and ice out there.  That's winter in Minnesota, though, so I guess I have to deal with it.

I mentioned in my last post that I've taken up cross country skiing.  It has proven to be a good activity to see me through some of these winter days.  I really enjoy it.  I'm learning from a member of my parish who has trails cut around his property.  It's great to be able to learn from someone who has been skiing for almost as long as I've been alive, and to be doing it out of sight of others.  I had never been on skis of any kind in my life before, so I fell a lot the first time, even a couple times on level ground!  It would have been embarrassing and frustrating to go through that in a more public place.  Luckily my teacher is very patient and encouraging.  By the second and third time, I was doing much better.  I still fall every once in a while going down some of the steeper hills, but I improve every time out.  It's great cardio work and really enjoyable to be out in the woods.  I wish I could do it more, but it takes more of a time commitment than running, so I'm only able to get out and ski once a week or so. 

On a deeper level, the whole experience has reminded me of how important mentors are for us throughout our lives.  Perhaps there are some people out there who really are "self taught" at certain things, but for most of us, we need others to look up to and to instruct us.  I've been thinking a lot about how we are essentially relational beings.  We are not individuals who form relationships.  Instead, our individual identities emerge out of the relationships around us.  This is not meant to pass the buck, as if we aren't responsible for our actions as individuals.  For me, it just brings a greater understanding to who I am and why I am.  It also helps me remember that I'm not running (or skiing) alone.  Since winter can be pretty isolating here in the north, that's no small thing. 

Perhaps that's one hidden blessing in winter.  It gives you a healthy appreciation of the blessings you enjoy when they return.  Maybe I would start to hate running if I could do it in 65 degree weather all year long.  A little time to wait and reflect and anticipate that joy again is good in its own way.  Like spending time away from a good friend, it can make the reunion that much more joyous. 

Beginning again

This is life.  Life is starting something, working at it, seeing it succeed or fail (or land somewhere in between), and then starting something again.  Life is not a straight line, but more like a spiral...or maybe a double helix.  I'm not making any sense, so let me begin again...

I'm beginning again.  Last year's attempt at a blog and a half marathon failed...sort of.  They were both partially successful.  Not long after my last post, I injured my foot, which meant that I could not run the half marathon in May.  It also deflated my interest in blogging.  I know that's lame, especially because the posts I would have written at that time probably would have been my best.  So I was lame and the blog was lame. That's why I'm trying again, at both the running and blogging. 

So about the injury...I had worked up to running around 7 miles every other day in my Vibram shoes.  That turned out to be too much.  On Easter Sunday afternoon, at about mile 6, I felt something "catch" in my right foot.  I finished the run without much pain, but by the next day, I knew the pain I was feeling was not the usual muscle fatigue I had been used to.  I rested it and rested it, waiting for the pain to die down.  It didn't hurt all the time, only when I put weight on it in a certain way.  Finally, after two weeks, I tried running a little bit, but could hardly make it around the block.  I relented and went to the doctor.  They took X-rays, which showed there were no breaks or stress fractures (good news).  He concluded that I had ligamentous laxity (loose ligaments).  Basically, I had strained the ligaments in my foot, but not torn them.  He suggested I keep resting it and start running again when I felt comfortable, but starting with only a mile or so at a time. 

So that pretty much shot my training schedule and my hopes of running the half marathon.  I was pretty disappointed, but once I started running again, my wife encouraged me to set a new goal.  We picked a 10k in October to run with a couple of friends as our goal to work toward.  That gave me enough motivation to start running again once my foot felt better.  It wasn't long and I was back to feeling great during my runs, but I was still disappointed with the realization that running a half marathon may not be something I would ever do. 

But, since I was running up to 4 or 5 miles with no discomfort, I decided to run the 2 mile race for our city's summer festival (Bonanza Valley Days) in July.  Since the guy who would have finished 1st missed a turn (he was from out of town), I finished 3rd in my age category with a time of 14:35.  Obviously, it's not a very competitive race, but it was fun to run and show people around here what running in minimal footwear is all about. 

Soon, the summer was over and it was time for the 10k in Fargo in October.  I wasn't sure what to expect since I had never run in an event with that many people.  It turned out to be a complete blast.  I thought maybe there would be some others wearing Vibrams or running barefoot, but everyone that I saw was in running shoes.  I got a few looks from people and a few questions.  At the starting line, one guy asked, "Doesn't it hurt when you step on a rock?"  I just smiled and said, "I don't step on rocks."  :) 

Based on my training, I knew I could run it in under an hour, but I wasn't sure by how much.  I ended up finishing with a time of 54:23, finishing 115th overall out of 640 runners, 12/26 in my division, and 64/171 male finishers.  Even better, I finished feeling fantastic with absolutely no pain or soreness.  I sprinted across the finish line with a huge grin on my face.  I kept running through the fall, but that was it for races for me in 2010. 

So, with 2011 already 13 days old, I'm beginning again.  Based on my experiences of 2010, both the failures and successes, I've decided to aim again for the Fargo half marathon in May.  I'm more confident that I will reach my goal this time, but also more cautious.  My training is different this time.  I'm going to try to focus on cross-training, including some weight lifting (something I've never been fond of), and running less each time out.  I know my right foot can't take the pounding of running more than 6 miles on pavement very often, so I'm going to have to be careful.  I find that if I can get 3 miles in every day, that feels better than trying to run 6 or 7 miles every other day.  I will also try to do a lot more running on soft surfaces.  My experience at the 10k was that, when I'm feeling good, I can run and run and run.  The only thing keeping me from running more was the finish line.  I know my foot will hurt after the half marathon and I'll have to take some time off then, but I'm confident that I can keep it healthy until race day. 

With lots of snow and ice outside, it will be a while before I can even think about running.  I did run in the middle of a snowstorm a while back, which was exhilarating.  Nothing like looking back and seeing barefoot prints in the snow!  On a related note (and I'll write more about this later), in order to keep my cardio activity level higher during the winter, I've taken up cross country skiing.  I haven't been able to do it very often, unfortunately, but the time I've spent doing it has been great.

Ok, so that's enough for my first post in 9 months.  Here's to a great 2011 and to beginning again (and again).